Shaken to the Core
By Sunnie Alexander
People attend a protest as a part of the #MeToo movement on the International Women’s Day in Seoul, South Korea, March 8, 2018. REUTERS/Kim Hong-Ji
Author’s Note: Warning – the material may be graphic.
“I was nervous about reporting sexual harassment. I wanted it to stop. It had been going on for a few years, but I feared the consequences,” Diana alleges. “So, I reported the harassment to Human Resources. I was told there would be an investigation. Yeah, a so-called investigation. I was called a liar, a bitch, and an opportunist. I was never once asked by my colleagues for my side of the story. The day I reported sexual harassment is the day my library career ended. The person who harassed me was never disciplined. Instead, that individual was portrayed as the victim. No one can ever really know the stain that sexual harassment leaves in your soul and pours into every facet of your life.”
Stories like Diana’s have been shared with me over the course of nearly two years of investigating sexual harassment in libraries. Individuals from throughout the United States and from different types of libraries have reached out, and some have requested anonymity to protect their identities out of fear of what possible repercussions could await. All stories in this article are alleged.
“I’m not OK with that. Nobody really should be.”
It was just another day in the Children’s department, assisting a patron, behind a wall, that no one can see into when things took a dark turn, Carly alleges.
“I’m helping a person I think is looking for chapter books for their daughter. He wants to look at movies (directly behind the wall), and I walk him over to show him age-appropriate ones. Then, he pulls out his penis. I look down, and he has it out. I look to make sure none of the kids can see it before walking away and telling him to get out of the building immediately. Our security didn’t really do anything, so the police also didn’t do anything. I found out later that he had been bothering other female staff members, but they were too busy to ‘help’ him. I got a soft apology about what happened from the system, and the guy never officially got in trouble,” she says.
Sue will never forget the call she received at the academic library where she works. According to Sue, in June of 2017, a man, claiming to be writing a book about corporal punishment as a form of discipline, called seeking assistance. When Sue couldn’t find any information, the caller then asked for books on adult spanking and later offered her a job as a research assistant.
“The reality is, though, that it is sexual for him,” Sue alleges. “We know he’s seeking female voices because he always hangs up when a male gets on the phone. What he is doing in these phone calls is recruiting us as unwilling and non-consenting stars in the porn movie in his head. I’m not OK with that. Nobody really should be.”
The library at the University of North Dakota (UND) reported similar phone calls, which also occurred in 2017.
“This guy is escalating and tried to get at least two library staff to meet him in person. His requests are getting extremely graphic. This is so unacceptable. Library staff are there to provide library services, not to give a creep his jollies,” says Stephanie Walker, dean of libraries and information services at UND.
“Take accusations seriously, but don’t come to a conclusion until after an investigation.”
While stories of sexual harassment often focus on the victim, there is another side, as well. Thomas and Adam allege they were wrongfully accused of harassment. According to Thomas, co-workers were ready to submit accusations of sexual harassment against him because they wished another person had been hired for his job.
“The public library where I worked for many years had only a handful of male employees. Even fewer were librarians like myself. When I came to this particular branch, I was the only guy, and it became clear pretty soon that the others wished that [the person they preferred] had been chosen for my job,” Thomas alleges.
Like Thomas, Adam says he was accused of sexual harassment by a person who just thought he was “odd.”
“Many years ago, a female co-worker accused me of sexual harassment. She told the director that I ‘stood too close’ to her and the other female staff during work. I first heard about the whole issue when a co-worker’s mother followed me home and then threatened to send her husband to beat me up. Fortunately for me, everything I did was open to several witnesses,” Adam says. “I was easily cleared of any wrongdoing. The accusing woman…quit soon afterward. My director told me that when asked why she disliked me, the accuser responded, ‘He is just odd.’”
Among the things Adam says his experience taught him is, “don’t put yourself in situations where you are secluded with a co-worker. Always have a third person in the room. Secondly, take accusations seriously, but don’t come to a conclusion until after an investigation,” he says.
“We don’t talk about it”
For Libby, whose alleged multiple instances of sexual harassment were shared in Part One of this series, training plays a critical part in addressing the issue.
“Libraries need to recognize that in cultivating a workforce that prizes friendly helpfulness, we have created a target pool for harassers. We need systematic training on approaches to lay boundaries and ensure front-line workers have administrative support in any situation.”
Diana concurs and adds, “Training has to be more than a mere item to check off.”
“Even though training was offered and mandated at the library I worked at, no one actively participated in the training. It was looked at as a requirement instead of an opportunity to really learn. It was the same video training each year. I sat through that training after I reported my own sexual harassment and thought, ‘No one really knows what is really happening, and no one really gives a damn.’ I want libraries to give a damn about the people, in every library position, and really be advocates for preventing this behavior. Take it from someone who knows,” Diana says.
According to Allison West, employment attorney and HR trainer, training needs to go beyond just saying what not to do.
“Training has to be meaningful. The most effective type of training is discussion-based training focusing on various types of conduct and must also focus on the gray areas. Employers can’t be afraid to have discussions about sensitive topics. The training must also emphasize that the policy applies to everyone,” she says.
West adds that discussions during training can offer an opportunity for colleagues to hear different perspectives.
“Both, in training and as an investigator, people will say, ‘But I asked the person for permission’ — maybe tell a joke or to hug. For example, a co-worker says to another co-worker, ‘Hey, that’s such great news. I would love to give you a hug. Is that OK?’ If the question was asked in front of a group of people, the person being asked might be inclined to say yes even though he or she would rather say no. Some people are afraid of being ostracized, or if the person making the comment has power, then he or she will be reluctant to truthfully reply. Managers have the ability to change terms and conditions of someone’s employment, and voila, that changes everything. I tell folks in my training, ‘You cannot ask permission and expect that to be your free pass because some will say yes to the hug because they like the person and don’t want to hurt his or her feelings when the reality is they don’t want the hug,’” West says.
The most productive methods involve active participation, says Jennifer Drobac, Indiana University, Robert H. McKinney School of Law.
“…Effective trainings include live role-play and discussion with experienced instructors. Online video trainings are OK but not great for fundamental change,” she says. “And, the leaders of the organization must participate and demonstrate that a safe and equitable work environment is a priority for them.”
Sexual harassment, says Elise, a small public library manager, “is an issue in our community,” and she wishes it could be discussed openly.
“We don’t talk about it. We never have. It’s a shame we have to keep in that way but I guess it’s about survival,” she says. ■
Part III will be in the February issue.